About Me
Life started for me on October 12, 1981 in Omaha, Nebraska. At the time, my dad was just finished with medical school and doing his residency. I was the 5th boy. I still don't know how they managed with so many children at the time. My dad was probably gone 16 hours of the day. My mom's just amazing, that's all there is to it. When I was 2 years old we moved from Nebraska to Kaysville, Utah. I'm going to partition my life from this point into 5 areas:
Kaysville, UtahLife in Kaysville was pretty normal. My dad worked, my mom stayed home and as kids we had a fun time destroying the house. Life was good. I enjoyed myself. I remember canning, picking strawberries, playing in the sandbox for hours. Life was carefree and easy.
I remember going sledding in our back yard once, Steve and I. We thought we could go off the jump that Dave, Joel and Josh built no problem! Ten minutes later, we both had the wind knocked out of us and we were at the bottom of the hill, with not even enough air to call for help. Steve finally got his strength up and helped me back to the house. We didn't go on any jumps after that, at least not that I remember.
I remember climbing up the wall with our hands and feet. You see, the two walls in the hallway were close enough together that, if your feet/hands were sticky enough, you could get all the way to the cieling! When our hands and feet weren't sticky enough, we'd use the honey that was in our food storage and climb up with that. I think that might have taken a little while to clean up, if it ever got cleaned up (I don't know if my parents knew that we did that...).
I remember playing Monopoly and Risk till the wee hours of the morning. It was awesome! There was one family home evening in particular that was great. I was barely alive because of my railroads, but Dave had just about everything else. He won, but I kept the game going for a while. Now that I think about it, I don't think anyone really wanted the game to go that long. I just wanted to keep playing. They just wanted to go to bed...
I remember being really sick once when just about everyone in our family was sick too. My dad happened to be out on a camping trip with the boy scouts. That was not a fun weekend.
I remember going to primary once and they asked us to bring a dollar to buy a Book of Mormon to send to a missionary with our testimonies. I didn't have the money, and I told Steve that. He gave me a sheet of about 20 baseball cards and then later came and paid me a dollar for them. I had the money to buy the book and Steve had his baseball cards back. I didn't realize how generous and kind that was at the time.
I remember trying to memorize the McDonald's song that came out; You know how it goes "Big Mac, McBLT, a quarter pounder with some cheese." I could probably sing most of the song still today. We would always try to sing it with just one breath. I finally deemed it impossible. My brother Josh could do it. He's now in the Mormon Tabernacle Choir...
I remember water a piece of dirt on the west side of the house. My dad was convinced that grass would grow if we just watered it. I watered it for weeks with no result. I think we ended up just putting down sod.
Sprinkler systems are always fun to put in, especially as a family. Canning, doing dishes, cleaning the house. It's always better as a family.
Steve and I were given the chore once of pitting all the cherries. There were hundreds, if not thousands to pit! We got to be so fast, we were sure we could outpit anyone! It was a great time!
Most of my memories from Kaysville are with Steve. We did basically everything together. When there weren't more people to play Monopoly, we'd play one on one. We play eachother at Risk until well after midnight. Then we'd wake up early the next morning just to play again.
It was pretty cool being young.
Billings, MontanaBillings was a little different. By this time I was already a fifth grader, basically ruler of the school. In Kaysville we all played soccer, but in Billings, during recess, it was all about basketball and kickball. I made friends fairly quickly. I didn't really have too many friends because I was the new guy. It was a hard move for me. It was awkward at first. The only guy I knew was Gunner Stirling. He was in my primary class and, therefore, was my best friend. Really my only friend.
Ok, enough sob story, let's get to the good stuff. I had two girlfriends at one time. They both knew about it, though. It was great!
When I was in the middle of my sixth grade year, my parents decided to homeschool. They pulled us all out and we homeschooled. Social life from that point consisted of church, basically. There was a homeschoolers association and we did some things with them. I remember being part of the homeschool association basketball team and reciting scriptures before each practice. That was interesting. I went to high school for choir which Steve was a part of too. We went to Edmonton my Freshman year. It was fun hanging out with Steve and his friends. He had gone to high school and I hadn't, except for choir. It was really cool because Steve was cool. He was the student body president for 2 years and a really good basketball player. It was awesome being Steve Gardner's little brother. I think a lot of doors were opened up for me that wouldn't have been open otherwise.
Steve and I went to EFY together and subsequently went to BYU Education Week. Of the two, I think we both enjoyed Education Week more. We built off eachother's spirituality and example. I think there were a few things he learned from me and there were a ton of things I learned from him.
The Billings era was all about defining myself. Becoming someone. I remember trying everything Steve tried. I was never as good, it seems, but I didn't realize it's because I didn't have the passion for the things that Steve had. I tried debate and really was terrible at it. The things that define me now were shaped in those days. I took a Spanish class that was awesome. I realized I love languages. I took an English class and loved it. I realized that I love reading. During my high school years, I learned more about my own identity than at any other time. From then on out have basically been building on that identity.
As much fun as I had in Billings, I always felt there was something more for me. I was anxious to go to college. That's when I decided to skip my senior year, work to earn money for school and go to college early. I decided to sign up for BYU-Nauvoo and was accepted. Through my mother's pleading, my brother, Josh also decided to go. That brings us to the Nauvoo Era.
Nauvoo, IlliniosMy BYU-Nauvoo Semester was the first time I really felt like an adult. I could basically do anything I wanted, stay out as long as I wanted and become the fullest expression of myself possible. This was the time when the bond between my brother Josh and I really grew. I learned from his example and we just had a blast together. I remember talking about the girl that he was Engaged to when he was having some misgivings about their relationship. She was the reason my mom wanted Josh to get away for a while. To knock some sense into him.
We both worked as dishwashers, earning money as we went along. We took a ton of pictures, laughed till the early morning hours and studied till the morning. We ran around with fun in our eyes, ready for the days to come. It was a carefree and wonderful time. I really grew and learned. My friends were mostly returned missionaries. We sat till the early morning hours, sometimes, reading scriptures. We read the King's Follet discourse in the very area it was given. The days were spiritual and so were the nights. At the end of our time there, we had a trip to all the church history sites. Farr West, Independance, Kirtland, Palmyra, Haun's Mill and many more. What a glorious time.
About half way through the semester, Josh and I got a phone call from my mom. We had both been accepted as performing missionaries in Nauvoo for the summer. It felt like a heaven sent thing. Little did Josh and I know how much of an impact on our two lives this sojourn as missionaries would be in Nauvoo. The rest of our lives would be impacted from that very time.
We got home from our Semester and then almost immediately went straight back. This time as set apart, performing missionaries. Two weeks of intense rehearsal and a summer of fun. We would sleep when we could and laugh when we couldn't. We made up songs and wrote journal entries to die for. We read scriptures and sang till the early morning. We would make our audience cry and laugh. The sisters were amazing. Their depth of talent was unmatched in our little group of Elders. There were two sisters I was particularly close to: Sister Marriott and Sister Larsen. The latter became my sister-in-law and the former became like my sister. We were all very close, though. It was like a big family unit. The Elders were good cooks (at least three of the elders).
I remember writing a little song to sing at the Mississippi river concert. About a frog named Jake. It was pretty cool. Maybe one of these days I'll record it and put in on the website. Among the Elders, I was particularly close to Elder Marshall and Elder Gardner Sr. (I was Junior). I was the youngest one there, by far. I was 18 years old. I submitted my papers for my full-time mission and I was going to be 18 when entering the MTC.
Now, that's a good memory. Receiving my mission call was awesome. Everyone had gathered who could in the basement of the visitor's center. They all put their guesses as to where I would go. I was sure I was going to South America. Little did I know. When I opened my mission call, Josh saw where I was going first and he just started bawling. We hugged and I hugged basically everyone else besides the Sisters. "I'm going on a mission!" I thought. I was really going to go. I would go to Armenia and go into the MTC on the same day as Elder Marshall! That was awesome! It was also about 3 weeks before my 19th birthday. I didn't know they could do that! I figured it would probably be a similar language to what Steve was Speaking in Romania. Ha ha! It's not similar to anything! I was excited, though. Really excited.
ArmeniaFirst was the MTC, which stands for Missionary Training Center. This involved eight weeks of the most intense studying I've ever had. I remember my first day in the MTC...I was an emotional wreck. I had just said good-bye to my family forever, it seemed, and though I was excited for the destination, I was very apprehensive about the road to it. I got my bag of books in a language I couldn't read, my bag of clothes that was supposed to last me two years and that was it. Nothing else. Walking down the hall into my dorm room, I found myself feeling very, very alone. Then, just as I started putting things away, I heard someone behind me almost scream, "Gardner?!" It was Elder Marshall, one of the missionaries from Nauvoo! I couldn't believe it!
I met my MTC companion, Elder King. We got along well. Great guy...but I think that the thing that got me through it all was Elder Marshall. We sang together, laughed together, cried together and everything else in between. One particular memory of note: we had to clean out the bathrooms for a service project. We got the tile floor totally wet and soapy, and ran, sliding down the tile floor. It was so much fun!
Armenia came sooner than later. Speaking maybe a few words of Armenian, I boarded a plane and the next thing I knew I was in the place I would call home for the next 2 years. My first impression was that a bomb had blown up the place. It was all very foreign and dirty to me. Everyone smoked. Everyone wanted to carry my bags and I presume get paid for it. I did my best to explain that we didn't have any money.That didn't work too well. My only respite was seeing my mission president in the background. He was in a suit and a tie, white hair and had a smile on his face. Next to him was the mission driver, Ruben. We had breakfast at his house and it was delicious. Then I was assigned a companion. Elder Biggs would be my trainer.
Elder Biggs was a great trainer, despite that we had six months together. It is not typical for someone to be trained for more than a few months. We had some good times, some frustrating times and some times that I'd like to forget. Mostly it was just a great learning experience in a new culture.
The next companion was Elder Boyce. On the first day of our companionship, we decided not to speak English to eachother. He had been out 2 months longer than I and we both needed language practice. It was hard, but worth it as months of being with my trainer had slowed my language growth. We taught a lot, baptized a few families and mostly just learned. It was an exceptional growing period of my mission and my life.
I remember wanting this family to be baptized and praying so hard that they would be able to. There were some complications and questions as to whether they were going to be able to be baptized. I remember kneeling down for what seemed like hours in prayer for this family. The next morning, we recieved word that they could be baptized and I began to understand the power of prayer and of miracles.
My next companion was only my companion for 1 month and he went home. Elder Harris was a great missionary. He and I were put into a brand new area that hadn't had missionaries for a while. We had no-one to teach and the man was ready to go home. He was scheduled to fly out on September 13, 2001. You can only guess that his flight was delayed. He went home a week later.
I guess now would be a good time for a little blurb on September 11,2001 and it's affect on my life. It was 8:00 or 8:30pm when I heard. My companion and I were doing a service project in the church. Not an ideal time to do a service project, but like I said, there was no-one to teach at the time. The Branch President called and told us that buildings were blowing up. We immediately hopped into a marshrutni and went over to his house. In the marshrutni, I heard "America" in Russian several times. Everyone kept looking at us more than usual, and they always looked at us a lot. We got to my Branch President's house and sure enough; right as we walked in the second tower fell. CNN was broadcasting it all live. I couldn't believe my eyes. Why would they do such a thing? Thousands of innocent died. History was happening right in front of my face more than 1000 miles away.
Elder Harris went home and for the next month or so we weren't allowed to wear our nametags. We couldn't go outside for the next couple days. I was amazed at the Armenians' kindness toward us. There were random strangers on the street who stopped us and told us how sorry they felt for us. "Shnorhakalutyun" (Thank you) I would reply. They know how it feels to have others encroach on their land and their freedom. In that moment we were brothers. In that moment we both were mourning. They for what has happened and is still happening to them and I for what had never happened and hoped would never happen again.
My next companion was Elder Harvie. Oh yes, the Hav meister. I still keep in touch with Elder Harvie. I don't know what kind of a person I'd be without the man. I was in my first area for 9 months and with only 2 companions. Then 1 month with Elder Harris. Now, I was the senior companion yet I felt equal to the man. He had only been out 2 months less than me. We didn't teach too much. We were in the same area as before and nothing had changed. We visited as many less-active members as we could. A new Branch President was called and we were commissioned to train him. Train him we did. We were only together for 1 month, Elder Harvie and I, but I think that was the best time of my mission. We just had fun. Elder Harvie taught me how to have fun while doing the Lord's work, and that has changed my life.
We stayed in the same branch and both got new companions fresh from the MTC. I was in Erebuni and he was in the center of town. My next companion was Elder Lloyd and boy the Lord knows how to humble you. Of course he didn't speak very well, but we had a good time at first. We got to know eachother and he was very serious. We worked well together, but every once in a while he would get so down on himself that it would be impossible to work. I remember one day we were walking down the street, kicking some rocks as we went. He kept going on about how he wasn't good enough and he'll never amount to much. I did my best to encourage him. After days of this kind of talk, I just turned to him and said something like, "Well, what did you expect? Did you come out here thinking the Lord is just going to give you the language without you working at it? Did you think this was going to be easy?"
we were together for 5 months. I think those were some of the hardest months of my life. I was tested and when I thought I couldn't give any more emotionally, I was tested again. I felt like the Lord was beating me down making me ready for something else. We baptized a few people, but not as many as normal. While I was there one of the people we baptized stopped coming to church. Usually they stop after you leave, if they do stop. This one hurt a lot because I saw the potential in her. It hurt even worse because it was her boyfriend who told her not to go anymore. She tried to give back the Book of Mormon that we had given her and all the literature that we had given her. I wouldn't take them back. They were a gift. The pain of Erebuni will live long in my heart. But the lessons learned from the pain will live longer.
I was next called to be a missionary in Nork. This was an interesting time because we had an uneven amount of missionaries, so they called Priests who were getting ready to go on a mission to be my companion. I went through 6 companions. During one of the companionships we found a family that was incredible. The Poghosyans were becoming ready to hear the gospel and I was lucky enough to happen to be in their area at that time.
There were many times when we would baptize a family but the father wouldn't join. It was rare to find a father and the entire family who wanted to join the church. We started teaching them and the father was a typical smoker. We taught them and we usually would wait to teach them about the word of wisdom until the fourth discussion. I felt like we should teach them earlier to help the father stop smoking. We taught them the second discussion and we had prepared some things to help him stop. We bought a bag of probably 30 packs of big red gum and then took a glass jar and put a label on it that said "Tsxel dexz" (Smoking medicine). After we challenged them to be baptized, they all accepeted except for the father who said he would never be able to quit smoking. He'd been smoking since he was 10. I said, "Berel enk mi ban kez ognelu." (We've brought something to help you). I reached into my bag and pulled out the jar of m&m's with the label on it and also the packs of gum. I looked him straight in the eye and with all the energy of my soul said, "Gitem vor du karox es targel Tsxel Tiroj ognutyamb. Menak ches karox, bayc Astco ognutyamb du karox es." (I know that you can quit smoking with the help of the Lord. You can't do it alone, but with the Lord's help you can). The Spirit bore witness to him that he would be able to and accepted the challenge to be baptized.
The next day we were walking around and saw him. He was chomping away at his gum. He smiled and waved. "Derr chem tsxel" (I still haven't smoked) he said. Our next appointment with the family was in 2 days. When we saw him again, he had an interesting story to tell. He said that all around him his friends at work were smoking and he felt the urge so powerfully in his body to smoke. He said he went into a corner of the room and just looked at the corner and prayed just like we'd taught him. He asked the Lord for help and at that moment, he felt the urge leave him and he didn't want to smoke. He got some more gum and finished the shift. His testimony of prayer grew and he grew. Within the next few weeks they were baptized. Every member of the family. I hear from them every once in a while. All the time with stories from the church and how it's going in Nork. The chance to be associated with a family like that comes once in a while. The chance to be a factor in changing the life of a family like that comes once in a lifetime.
A life lesson learned from the Poghosyans: if there is anything that I think is too hard for me to accomplish it probably is. But it's not too hard for me and the Lord.
I thought of my time in Nork as the golden age. Life was going well. We had more people to teach and we had just baptized one of the best families in the country. I was comfortable and the members were comfortable with me. That's when you know things are going to change.
My next call came to serve with Elder Beal, one of the best missionaries there. The reason we were put together was to because the assignment I had was going to be a hard one. I was to be the Branch President in Ashtarak. It was hard. We taught 1 first discussion and nothing else. We tried just about everything to get people interested in the church, but nothing worked. It didn't help that the local Armenian Apostolic Priest had it in for us. About that time some anti_Mormon literature was being published and some of our members were reading it. Most of them were fine, but some were slipping away.
Welfare was hard to figure out. because this was a communist country before, everyone thought that each person should receive equally, and not based on need. There were 3:00am drives to deliver food so that the neighbors didn't know. The heat was intense.
We organized a young women group and called a president and counselors. Sundays were funny because Elder Beal and I would trade off conducting the services. I would play the piano and bless the sacrament. Sometimes pass. It was a two man show. Remember how I told you hardly any men were baptized? Well, that leaves my companion and me to do the Priesthood functions.
We tried teaching English, thinking that would get people interested. That was our only first discussion. The moment they heard the name Joseph Smith, they didn't want anything more to do with us. It was a hard couple months, but it was only a couple months.
President next called me into his office and asked if I would mind training someone. I told him I only had 1 month left, but I'd do whatever he wanted. He then asked if I would mind staying an extra month. I agreed. I trained Elder Peery. The last two months of my mission, I worked harder than I ever had before. I was put back into the same branch as the Poghosyans, but not in the same area. During those last two months I baptized more people than the entire rest of my mission combined. It was a great harvest of souls. I felt like I only had a few moments left, so I had to give it my all. Needless to say, we worked hard. Harder than I had ever worked previously. I wanted to give all my knowledge to Elder Peery.
Some time during this period I received word that one of my dear friends, Georgia Marriott had passed away. She was a missionary with me in Nauvoo. It was a sad day, a very sad day. I wasn't really sure what to think or how to function. She wasn't much older than me.
The crowning moment of my mission came on my second to last week, which happened to be 1 day after my birthday, October 13 2002. Brother Poghosyan had been interviewed to recieve the Melchizedek Priesthood. He asked if I would ordain him. The joy I felt isn't something that can be described in words. I ordained him and prayed with all my heart that he would remain faithful. He has and his family is beautiful.
Post MissionSo, I came home and didn't really know anyone. My family had moved to Cleveland, Ohio while I was on my mission, so I came home and reported to a bunch of strangers. Nothing new, I guess, except that I, at this point, knew almost every member of the church in Armenia.
Before I left my Mission President gave me counsel that he didn't give any of the other four who were going home. He told me not to waste my time and to start dating right away. I did. I took out a nice girl from the ward who was going to college from Utah. Her name is Mary Price. We had a great time! It was so weird dating, though! I'm sure she thought that I was just a dork or something. I didn't even really know how to talk to girls. I'd never had a girlfriend up to that point and it was really awkward.
One day my sister's boyfriend suggested that we go to a singles ward lunch that was going on. I went and realized that there were other women who I could date out there. I decided to go to church at the singles ward.
The next Sunday, I sat next to the two friends I'd made at lunch the previous week, Lea Ruben and Emily Utt. One of their friends, Brittany Platt, was playing cello that day. I remember thinking the sound I was hearing was something more beautiful than I'd heard before on the cello. Then I looked at the girl and thought the same thing!
After sacrament was over, I went up to Brit and told her she did a good job. The first words out of her mouth were, "You knew Georgia?" I had known Georgia. After talking for a minute, it turns out that Brittany and Georgia were in a quartet together while they were in high school. I think the fact that I knew Georgia made going out with me ok.
I called Brit and we went out 3 times that week. It was so much fun being with Brit! I loved every minute of it. I remember feeling warn out from laughing so much! Kind of crazy.
To make a long story short, I moved to Rexburg to go to school and she stayed in Cleveland. Our relationship grew while talking to eachother over the phone. Crazy how that works. I flew out and surprized her February 15, 2003. We then started talking about marriage. In April I proposed officially. She went to Germany to study German. I was an EFY counselor. I went to school during the summer and she came and lived with her parents in Salt Lake to be a little closer to me. In the fall, I went to school in Cleveland and she started school in Ann Arbor, Michigan. We were married December 23, 2003. After looking back on the counsel my Mission President gave, I realized that I probably wouldn't have met Brit in time. The Lord sure knows what He's doing.
We spent our first year of marriage in Ann Arbor. I worked mostly while she went to school. I worked at Zoup! It was a soup company. Really good soup and my boss liked me so he gave me a raise probably a little more often than he would normally.
I got a scholarship to go to BYU and studied linguistics. I graduated in April of 2006 and then spent the summer studying Arabic in Jordan. I came home and hoped to find a job working for the NSA only to find out that I need some more time to study Arabic before I can get a job there. I looked at other options, and found myself working at Sears full-time as an electronics salesman while looking for something a little more permanent. Brit was basically supporting us herself.
After many months of searching, I finally found something that would get us through. I became a techical support agent at a web development company. A month later we found a house and then our first baby girl was born 2 days after signing the papers. Her name is Della Lucinda Gardner.
She was born about 1 month premature, but she was totally healthy, as her mommy took care of her body while Della was still growing. Della is close to walking now. Kind of crazy.
So that's about me. The most recent stuff you'll find on my blog. That'll be my most recent history, so you can go there for that.
Just one last word before I go. I feel like I'm the luckiest man in the world to have a wife who loves me, a daughter who loves me and a family that is just incredible. Family is what it's all about, and mine is amazing.